The challenge: Family and friends

Is the path to growing yourself always smooth?



Obviously it is not, or there would be no hesitation to take it. It may get rough, challenging, and difficult. Understanding the path will help you better prepare yourself for the journey. The issue of your current relationships with others is one issue you would be wise to understand. Many would be success stories have crashed and burned because of a lack of this understanding.


The moment you definitely decide to grow as a person, you become a different person. The very decision to grow causes a shift in your energy. You are no longer in status quo mode. You are in growth mode. This means change. You may change, but others in your circle may not be ready, willing, or even interested in changing themselves.


This sometimes causes a rift of conflicting emotions. This can be especially noted between you and family members or close friends. Most who have become truly successful in making a change in themselves, whether it be losing weight, getting more fit, earning more money or whatever, would agree that more important than the goals they achieved is the person they had to become to achieve those goals. In stretching and reaching for your goals, you are becoming a different person. This is the best part. You are growing and becoming a bigger and better person. Others will look at you differently.


Some will look at you with pride and respect. Some will look at you with jealousy and criticism. Still others will look at you with genuine concern. They will be thinking you are only setting yourself up for failure and will be let down. They fear for you. You must understand none of these ways that people look at you have to have anything to do with you. They have to do with them. These people are looking at you through their own mindset, not yours.


It is your mindset that will get you what you want, not theirs. And it is their mindset that will keep them right where they are. Remember, you want change. You seek to grow. Your mindset is the key. Your commitment is the fuel. Your action is the vehicle. Now get moving!


Besides, you might consider where these people are that are criticizing you or trying to give you advice. Are they where you want to be? Chances are they no better off than you, and you want to move on. If you’re going to take advice, take it from someone who is where you want to go. If you don’t know anyone personally who is at the level you desire to be, you can find them in books and audio tapes or CDs. Learn from them. They have what it takes to help you grow.


As you do grow, you may find your circle of friends going through a change. “Will I lose my current friends?” This is an often asked question. Changing circles of friends is a normal occurrence in any person’s life. When your life changes, your environment will also change. Then there is the sticky situation of family.


It does happen that conflict develops when one family member is for some reason drawn to take a different path in life. Family bonds are normally quite strong, but in the end, you must follow your heart. This does not mean to blow off your family in any way. What it means is that you do what you can to help another member see what you are doing and why. Grant them the sovereignty to hold their own beliefs and judgments, but you must be true to yourself.


Surely you would at least do the same for them, would you not? Whatever you do, don’t argue your point. Simply continue to make yourself available as you always have in the past. Allow your results to speak for themselves. Remain humble in your stance. After all, the most fundamental purpose of life is to grow and to share. Keep this in mind and you won’t go wrong.



To your growth,


Jeffrey Brandt





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